The Moment Of Truth. Part 1.

am so glad that most people that i know are/were having a good celebration of eidul fitri. as for me, ntah la. difficult to describe. perhaps this is the most sombre celebration as far as i cud remember. the first raya evening my family and i are already back at our own house. wat to do. am at the verge to be disowned by my own parents and family. supposed to be with them after spending the morning at in laws. at the moment am walking a tite rope where i cud easily be thrown out of the equation. and the most dangerous factor is as what i told my wife, 'i am innocent'. i felt that injustice has been inflicted on me. thus, plus my stubborn and hardheaded approach, i might slip further.

at the moment i tried not to think much about it. there are a lot other things that require my immediate attentions. as for my family, in a way this is perhaps the answer for my wife's wish. we celebrate this raya closely amongst us 'anak beranak'. as this is perhaps our last raya together. but at least the kids are having fun.

what may come will come. and as i mentioned earlier, mebbe the worst is yet to come. tho i hope it is over.

i made promise to myself to hold back and to be patience a bit in order to make this hari raya as much as enjoyable to everybody else. nevermind what i felt and what i thot. now that hari raya is over, tho some may say ari raya is a month of celebration, perhaps now is the time to face the truth. all i need is for Him to grant my prayer, give me the strength, give me the ammunition. now is the time to resist and fight back, if they ever dare to test my patience again.

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"Then it comes to be that the soothing light at the end of your tunnel, it is just a freight train coming your way" ... Metallica, No Leaf Clover.