Ejen 008 - Lesen MeNgikLan.

ini adalah iklan untuk sesaper yang berkeinginan membeli atau menyewa umah di area Taman Bukit Subang, Shah Alam.

a. rumah teres 2 tingkat 4 bilik 3 bilik air. tanah berukuran 20 x 70 kaki. keluasan siapbina sekitar 1,600 kaki persegi. end-lot dengan keluasan tanah lapang lebehkurang 10 kaki. kipas dan lampu yang cantik siap terpasang. kabinet dapur dengan kemasan 'top concrete table' tersedia. grill siaap terpasang. lokasi menarik. tidak mengadap atau membelakangkan matahari terbit atau terbenam. sewa RM1,000-00 sebulan.

b. apartmen berpagar di kawal oleh pengawal keselamatan. tingkat 3. keluasan binasiap 900 kaki persegi. sewa RM400 sebulan.

sesapa yang berminat sila2 jangan malu dan segan kontek pemunya blog ini. harga untuk jualan di maklumkan sekiranya berminat.

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Peristiwa Ari Jumaat : Ampat.

lepas semayang jumaat satu ari tu ... member aku si DD pun bawak la kita org gi wat site visit. kita org lambat balik opis la kiranya ari tu.

si DD ni dah beli rumah kununnya. yg best nyer dia tak tgk pun umah cuntuh seblom beli. lepas beli baru sibuk nak gi tgk umah cuntuh.

kami tiga worang pun gi la ke site sales opis. ari ujan masa tu.

masuk dlm site sales opis tu .. sowang mak cik ni pun layan la si DD tu. ada la beberapa org lagik kakitangan kompeni yg jual umah tu.

dah lama skit si DD pun bertanya lah kat mana dia leh tgk umah cuntuh? buhsan la plak asik tgk gamba ngan model umah yg saiz kecik tu.

sorang mamat lembut pun dtg entertain si DD. aku dah start senyum kamben pada si DD. si DD lak wat muka macho...

tetiba mamat lembut tu tukar attention dia kat aku ...

"abg pernah beli umah ngan saya ya?" dia tanya kat aku.
" err...tader. tak pernah. saya beli ngan cik M" jawab aku.
"bukan apa... abg ni mcm pamiliar aje lah" mamat lembut tu cakap. member2 aku yg dua org tu plak dah senyum kambeng ....

"abg beli umah kat area mana?" tanya mamat lembut tu lagik.
"kat area TBS, pacel M" aku jawab.
"owh..abg dok kat situ lah ya?" tanya dia lagik.
"a'ah ..." jawab aku pendek".
"saya pun duduk kat area2 situ" tambah mamat tu lagik.

masa balik tu si DD dah start acara baling bom. "memang la pamiliar. baru malam tadik ko langgan dia".
"hahahahaha" si DD dah gelak sama Ba'en.

"oit ... mamat lembut tu juleng la... dia cakap dengan ko sebenarnya DD, bukan dengan aku" balas aku balik. pheww... sib baik aku cekap... si DD lak kene defense...

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Peristiwa Ari Jumaat : Tiga.

lepas semayang jumaat satu ari tu..ari ujan lebat. kami pun tak leh la nak blah. kete pun parking agak jauh. dah lambat kan.

kami pun lepak la kat tingkat atas masjid tu. aku gi satu tempat kat tepi...dok bersandar kat dinding. pas tu member aku lagik dua org pun juin samer. kami pun borak la. tapi sore tu kontrol la skit tak leh kekuat. had kelucahan pun di kurangkan ke paras yang teramat lah rendah nya.

dah lama skit, ujan lagik, member aku sowang lagi mula landingggg ... dah berbaring lak dia. aku pun biasanya patut dah landing dah sebenarnya tapi sebab duduk bersandar tu dah elok selesa, aku pun duduk sandar je lah kat dinding.

tetiba ... sowang pakcik ni yg tadi nya tengah dok bersembang ngan member2 dia tetiba dtg dekat. dia pun nak landing gak ....

pak cik ni pun landing dekat2 aku. pala dia dekat ngan peha aku. dia pun tepuk peha aku sambil cakap "pak cik tumpang baring ya?"

aku pun senyum jek. nak kata apa lak kan? tak kan tak bagik. tu bukan masjid aku.

yang tak besh nya, pak cik tu tak alih tangan dia. hujung jari dia elok jek duduk kat peha aku. ampeh betui.

member2 aku yg lagik dua worang tu dah senyum2 sumbing mcm kamben jantan nampak kamben betina goyang2 montot. lagik ampess ..

lepas tu dan waktu lepak kat kedai mamak petang nya... abis la aku jadik bahan. ampessss lagik skalik ...

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Peristiwa Ari Jumaat : Dua.

masjid yang kami selalu pergi untuk semayang jumaat ni letak nya dlm kawasan perumahan elit. orang kekaya yang dok situ sumer. kete mahal pun mcm2 jenis.

kalo bebudak anak2 org kaya ni...yang kecik lagi sekulah rendah...masing2 bawak basikal lagik. tapi yg dah besar skit.. dah sekulah menengah...bawak kete. yang bawak moto kapchai tader. apa kelas. lagi pun pada org kaya ni...bahaya bagik anak2 depa bawak motor. bawak kete lagik selamat.

kami pun selalu semayang di tingkat atas. kalo dtg lambat tingkat atas ni senang skit nak dpt tempat untuk solat. masalah nya bebudak yang ramai dok kat situ. jadik nya kalo bleh kami akan dok depan skit. kalo duduk dekat blakang....besar cabaran nya. ye lah..mcm2 bebudak tu punya pangai. yg sembang masa baca khutbah. main henpon la. yang memain masa solat; main tolak2 ader, buat2 lawak...borak2 pun ader. sabo je lahhhhh ..

satu ari tu..lepas semayang jek kami dengar munyi... 'panggg!!!'. rupanya sowang budak dah kene pelempang.

lepas baca doa tu n lepas semayang sunat masa nak blah tu...nampak dan kedengaran la ada satu pertengkaran... rupanya mamat yang lempang sowang budak tadi tu kene marah ngan bapak budak tu. bla .. bla .. bla ....

lantakkkk ...

kalo aku ler... ngan bapak budak tu aku dah lempang ... huhuhuhu

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Peristiwa Ari Jumaat : Satu.

satu ari jumaat, sampai jek waktu makan, aku ngan kawan aku si ba'en pun kuar la gi makan tengahari. kami dua orang gi kedai mamak mcm selalu. member kami sowang lagik tader gi meeting kat kl katanya.

tetengah makan tu member yang gi meeting kat kl tu tipon, dia on the way back. dia suwuh la kita org tunggu. dia dah dekat katanya.

tak lama kemudian..dia pun sampai. kami dua org yg dah abis makan tu pun tunggu la dia abis makan lak.

lepas makan ntah mcm mana leh siok lak bersembang. sembang punya sembang tak pasan masa dah lama lalu. tak pasan sebab ramai org kat kedai mamak tu.

'eh ... pesal sumer ni org ciner ngan hindu jek' tanya sorang member.

kami pun pusing paler tgk keliling. memang betui. sumer ciner ngan india jek. org melayu tader pun. tengok jam pun dah kol 1.30.

'cepat2 wei berambus..dah semayang dah ni'

cecepat kami bayo bil n terus blah. dlm kete bukak radio IKIM...tgh baca khutbah.

biasanya kami gi masjid jauh skit sebab masjid tu selesa. kalo gi mesjid tu kami akan tempuh 2 masjid lain dlm perjalanan.

sebab dah lambat aku pun berhenti la kat masjid pertama yang kami tempuh dlm perjalanan. tok katib pun tgh baca khutbah ke dua. member yang pollo kat blakang pun yak sangka kau berehenti kat situ... terhegeh2 dia tekan brek n parking blakang kete aku.

pheww... skit lagi kene semayang dzohor.

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Seductress ...

i am helping my fren to sell parfume. basically all kind of brands. as she put it, the parfumes are originally and they are the rejected by QC due to the imperfect of bottling, printing, packaging etc etc. the prices are slightly below the market.

sapa mau tetengok list price bleh bagitau ... i can forward the email.

talk abt parfume ni...i always thot that how many of us who sprayed the parfume for their spouses and partners? especially when they about to go to bed. most of them only wear it when they getting out of the houses.

if they are not, wat heppen when along the way their spouses or partners come across someone who play the seduction acts. who put wonders of make up on her face. or some tough and macho bloke. someone who can do un-imaginable things with their fingers and tounge or even with theor legs. someone who can make the sexiest voices and etc etc.

ever wondered why is the prostitute is the oldest business in town? and the first time clients wud always return seeking the treatment again and again and become addicting to it.

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Hmmm .. Hmmmm ...

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"Aku ingin menjadi mimpi indah dalam tidurmu
Aku ingin menjadi sesuatu yg mungkin bisa kau rindu"

- Once Dewa. Dealova.

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The Art Of Flirting ... 2

Scene 1 :

fren : ehhh ... aku dengar dia ada affair ngan mat tu la.
others : ala small matter tu. best man win!

Scene 2 :

fren : ehh ... dia dah bertunang la.
others : ala. kapalterbang atas langit pun orang hijack sekarang ni.

Scene 3 :

fren : engkau ni. dia tu kan dah kawen.
others : ala. aku pun dah kawen. compatible la tu.

Scene 4 :

fren : abih kalo tunang dia yang Mat Territory tu datang hempok ko mcm mana?
others : ala...buat la polis report.

Scene 5 :

fren : abih kalo rumah tangga dia hancus pasal ko mcm mana?
others : la. nasib la kan. aku bukan nya nak kawen ngan dia. aku nak menggatal jek.

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The Art of Flirting ...

i don't flirt. full stop. neither i just take what i want. i always ask first. sometimes if i was rejected i would just leave and move on. sometimes i will keep asking until i get what i want or i get bored of asking.

here i am being the subject centre of office gossip of having someting going on with my colleague, a beautiful lass indeed. at least two persons dare came forward and asking me direct about it. my answer was just a loud laugh followed by big grind and a simple denying. simple denial would be enuff coz i figured doesn't matter what i said will not kill the gossip anyway. how stupid the gossip is coz only a few days earlier one of person that came to me about it just told me the same lass having a relationship with other colleague?

at least i didn't break the news that all the efforts that i made such as getting the lass' phone number were actually for a friend of mine. and whatever happen between him and the lass is none of my business. i just did what i am supposed to do and what he asked me to do as a favour. that's all. and neither it is other people business as well.

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from a pile to a bucket of shits.

dare to lie? whatever the reason is wud u dare to lie.

ever notice that one lie doesn't stop there just as yet? as not to be caught with a lie, another lie need to be made to cover the first. and it shall continue on and on snowballing till at the end it breaks and everyone get at pieces of dirts and stinky smell. yet before it breaks the liar will suffer the gruelling emotions of guilt and the worst is to bear the fear and anxiety of his/her lie(s) being un-covered.

dare to lie? or wanna be a fool to lie?

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Musnah.

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bila benih padi di tabur
yang tumbuhnya hanya lalang
haruskah di racun tanah bendang
haruskah di bakar segala nan tumbuh melata.

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Tiada Lagi.

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aku lewati kembali
kuntum-kuntum cinta mu
yang telah lama kering dan layu
namun tersemat di dalam sanubari
menjadi sebuah lukisan memori
untuk rindu melepas resah.

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Evil & Devil : To Be Or Not To Be?

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a. shud i shrug off these peoples?

they have not taken their places ritely. rather than focusing on being what and who they should be, they keep themselves busy with other peoples' business either by putting an effort and money or getting their mind occupied with it. as a result, i was again and again troubled with their silly antics.

b. how shud i shrug them off?

should i do it merciless and not showing any emotions whatsoever? just fuck them off to their selfcentered faces? or still letting myself bound to my foolish angellic intentions and way of doing things by waiting for the rite time and situation?

c. being kind doesn't pay?

o dear Lord. don't let thee soul taken by the evil. for he wud be a real damned good devil.

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Ke Mana Nak Ku Berlindung?

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pada saat aku merindukan
bulan dan bintang
yang ku lihat tika mendongak
hanyalah awan hitam
dan hujan pun turun mencurah-curah.

lantas aku tertanya-tanya
ke manakah perginya sang pungguk
pada saat dan ketika ini.

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I've dreamt so long I cannot dream anymore ...

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" Dear my love
haven't you wanted to be with me
And dear my love
haven't you longed to be free"

- Anywhere. Evanescence. Origin Album. 2000.

*nota kaki ku di bibir mu : ni lagu tema blog ini buat masa sekarang.

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I Love You Ceaser But I Love Rome More.

how much you love your love one? more than you love yourself? more than you love your parents and siblings? more than anything and anyone in the world?

how much you should love her or him? how do you measure your love? where does it stop?

what are you willing to let go in order to get him/her? how far would you do? how much would you willing to sacrifice? doesn't matter how much would you do and willing, but how much and how far have you done?

no one love Ceaser. no one love Rome. it is just a sexcuse for 1,001 reasons to assassinate him like love for wealth, power and everiting. in short one only love her/himself but no one else.

unlike Ceaser, one who was promised love but never got it but word only is slowly and gradually assassinated and he/she shall suffer in every steps of life he/she is taking.

history is repeated but this time the crime is more horrendous and brutal.

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