Friday, March 30, 2007
Retro - Heppi Bezday!
Tag ooooOOOOO Tag.
ni ler pes taim pak cik kene tag. sib baik tak kene tag pasal 'prasaan d tinggalkan'. kalo tak ... pak cik tulis pepanjang mcm novel lak ;)) huhuhuhu.
Thursday, March 29, 2007
a lonely evening.
so determine to resume my study, i have to say no to my my ex's request to get marry when she put up that proposal during the last semester of our diploma course. she shed her tears at that time and deep in my heart i know something will go wrong. but that didn't change anything for me. so when am about to enroll for my degree course my ex did a disappearance act. she can't be contacted at all. even her sister can't assist me. somehow i managed to locate her and then she said the ultimate farewell, which i have been expecting for so long to happen. i tot i prepared for it but i was wrong. my world tumbling down from there on.
i can't concentrate on my study. worst is i can't even do well in my favourite subjects; accountings. and it was very frustrating. i almost failed thrice for a statistic paper which i got zero flat on my first sitting. which is if i did, sure kene kick out from the course. the strategy then was to graduate on time. doesn't matter if i can't do well but i must graduate on time. i was just study to get the pass marks. it was hell of a time. a dark 3 years period.
a couple of things that console me, first; a closed fren and a bunch of housemates that we all clicked together. a closed fren is from the same course and he also faced tough time in study. the rest of the housemates are from engineering school but we share common interest in computer & video games as well as nites outing. second was GnR albums of "Use Your Illusions I & II' which i listened to almost all the times using a borrowed walkman. even that cassettes i borrowed from my housemate. and the most favourite song is 'Estranged". got that word engraved on a few pendants that i wore either one all the times.
i managed to graduate on time but with unflying colours of course. but i was thankful. it was time to start new.
and here i am again, awaiting the right time to start new all over, again.
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
give me my racing car!
What if ....
i love ornamental fish. love to watch them gracefully swimming in the water. the fish i like the most is arowana or kelisa. used to frequent all the ornamental fish shops in klang valley that my crime in partner and myself heard there were beautiful arowana on display or for sales. i even ventured into the arowana trading once. as a result i have to travel to batu pahat, the biggest company selling ornamental fish especially arowana in malaysia located there. i know all types of arowana fish. the most fancy one. the most exotic one. used to have them also (kept the not so fancy one. the fancy is for sales). even gave one to my mom's. off course got to give them a nice and expensive aquarium also. but make no mistake. i do not fancy 'kelisa' car.
i am a loner. at least that what i think. sometimes i love being alone. spending time on my own alone. like driving slowly and peacefully while listening to my playlist loudly. most of the times my mind will wandering doing thinking and even dreaming. most of the times i keep my thot and my dreams to myself. but make no mistake. i hate the feeling of being lonely.
but what if that exactly being meant for me?
A Peek Over A Not So Balanced Diet.
Monday, March 26, 2007
Poster Poster Poster.
Friday, March 23, 2007
Thursday, March 22, 2007
A Moment Please.
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
Retro : Getting Fat & Loosing Fat.
when i was a kid i eat a lot since i was a very active child. having meals cooked by my mom i will definitely stop only after 2 plates of rices. staying at boarding school i kinda maintain my weight which is just fine.
the problem only started when i finished SPM exam and staying at home. my mom no longer cooks but my big sister. i would have to say her cooks doesnt fit to my throat. i started to loose weight ever since.
then after a while the idea came to go to gym after reading some of the magazine. before that i already started to buy bodyweight magazine everymonth ranging from 'Musclemag', 'Flex' and such other various mags.
after a while in the gym i gain my appetite and able to eat more. thus i gain weight. managed to add my weight to 70kg and maintain it ever since. my weist about 30".
after getting married my eating habits doesn't change much. thus my weist line kinda maintain. so is my weight. but over the years, unavoidable since i did not continue my exercise, my weight raised gradually and steadily more than 70kg & my weist grew to 32".
the serious problem of waist line and weight started when i started to roam at nights and lepaking with my frens until wee hour. due to we got nothing else to do other than minum2 & makan2. without me noticing i was actually gain weight. i only noted the problem when i had gastric problem during the fasting month. later on i had a problem similar to stomach ulcer. there i was getting a fierce lecture from the doctor "you must take your meals on time, not irregular time. otherwise this ulcer problem will be more painful than the women's menstruation pain!" she said. like i know or ever experience the women's monthly pain :p.
Monday, March 19, 2007
EnTah BiLa WakTuNya.
Friday, March 16, 2007
Retro : Me, Myself & I.
Thursday, March 15, 2007
Retro ... Preludium.
pic : Missing You by DavidsDRK
words : mz @ 2/03/07.
on mc today. but still have to come to office. got urgent matter to attend to. infact they called me up yesterday evening but i was asleep at home after swallowed those pills prescribed by the doc minus the sleeping pill.
am loosing my sleep too often. getting to sleep for 4 or 5 hours within 72 hours surely not a good thing. but as life is a struggle, am struggling to get my eyes closed for a good sleep.
trying to make myself busy with works. with my kids. with my home. alas as what i told myself few months back ... when tomorrow start, sorrow will be my soulmate ... exactly that is what it is now perhaps. no matter how good life will turn out to be ... what can smoothen up a heart in sadness?
last week i gave the bonus letter to my colleagues ... their faces brimmed with smile and happiness while i smiled with proud feeling. i told them ... the only reason i still come to work is for them.
like those lamps .. burning own life for others. how soon will these all end?
"sakit apa?" colleagues asked me.
"rindu .... " i answered them.
"kalu sakit windu ... bakpo dokter yang cucuk montot. orang yang di rindu la patut cucuk" replied one of them. we both them broke into laughter. as if it was a good joke. perhaps it is a joke?